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Couple refuse to tell anyone if their 17 month old is a boy or girl

A UK couple have decided to keep their baby’s sex a secret from everyone, including family, to avoid any gender bias.

Couple refuse to tell anyone if their child is a boy or girl

Hobbit Humphrey, 38, and Jake England-Johns, 35, refer to their 17-month-old child with the pronoun, “they”, and dress them in both girls’ and boys’ clothing.

The married couple, are keen to let their child choose their own gender identity when they are old enough because they wish for them to “grow into their own person”.

Close family members have not even been told the child’s sex and grandmother, Camille, only found out when she changed a nappy.

Speaking on the program, Camille said though it was a struggle at first not knowing how to refer to the baby, over time it became natural and her grandchild became “they.”

The couple, who live on a houseboat in Keynsham, Somerset,  told the BBC’s Inside Out: “The neutral in gender-neutral refers to us trying to behave neutrally towards our child rather than trying to make them neutral.”

“Eventually, we decided that we wouldn’t tell people whether they were a boy or a girl … in order to create this little bubble for our baby to be who they are,” Ms. Humphrey said.

The reaction to their decision has understandably been mixed. However, Mr England-Johns said: “But over a year in, it’s clear that we are serious and gradually people have got used to it.

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“Although, that still doesn’t stop some pretty confused looks from old ladies in the park when they come up to us and ask if they’re a boy or a girl. It can take a bit of explaining.

“We are quite good now at holding space for people’s discomfort in us going, ‘Oh well, actually we don’t tell anyone, we’re not telling anyone for now.”

 

Not the only parents raising a gender-neutral child

UK singer, Paloma Faith, has always refused to reveal the name or sex of her child, shared The Mirror.

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Speaking at the Q Awards at London’s Roundhouse a couple of years ago, Paloma said: “I’m loving being a mum.

“I want two or three kids in all and they’ll be gender-neutral.”

The Canadian government claims then 8-month-old, Searyl, (now 2yrs old), could be the first baby in the world without a government registered gender.

The child who was born in British Columbia, “outside the medical system,” did not undergo a genital inspection after birth, campaign group Gender Free I.D. Coalition said in a statement.

Searyl’s parent, Kori Doty, who is transsexual, says they want their child to be able to choose its own gender when it is old enough.

There was also a Californian couple who have said they will allow their child to decide whether he or she would like to be raised as a boy or a girl and until then raise him or her as gender fluid.

Do you think more parents should consider allowing their child to grow up gender-neutral?

 

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tracyhardy
written by:

Tracy Hardy

Tracy has been a digital content producer for the past 9 years. Mum of two boys, slowly finding her way through the tween and teen years at the same time. Beach lover. Terrible housekeeper. Tea drinker. Wine sipper, who sadly can't eat cheese or ice cream. Life is cruel!